sculptya

The whole time I wrote this I was listening to this and the original
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tdr9_ZZWxWI

I moved some stuff around and rearranged my room a little bit. I went to the book barn yesterday and got some books. when I got back I decided that I might wanna put a book shelf in my room since they were getting a little out of control on my night stand and by my bed. So I moved some stuff around, and decided to bring my drawing table up in my room as well. Now all I have to do is turn my swivel chair around and Im at my drawing table, and the book shelf is just on the other side of the table. ANYWHOOO, I brought the table up cause I was suddenly inspired to sculpt. I found something interesting in doing this which I told Keith.

Sometimes when I make art stuff, like drawings or paintings, I dont really know quite that Im doing it. Hmmm, that doesnt make much sense. Well let me try again. Often when I look back at gesture drawings that Ive done, I actually look at it as though I wasnt the artist, and what I see I usually like a lot. And this has nothing to do with being self obsorbed in my own skills or thinking that Im a great artist. The only reason I like it is usually beacuse I feel a connection with the artist and the lines or forms that were obviously observed in observing and creating the work. And sometimes I get that from my own work, where I look at it and think "hey I really like that!" And this is where I recall something that Michelangelo said about sculpting. He basically said that there is already a figure within a stone, and that its the job of the sculptor to just chip away the stuff thats not the figure so that the statue can be. Now I always thought that maybe this was him bragging, sorta like this is not necessarily the mindset of all sculptors, but that he was such a great artist, it was his opinion that this is the way he worked. Kinda like saying he cant help but be great and that maybe it wasnt hard for him to sculpt.

Well anyway, the whole reason I think about this thing that he said is because I actually understand what he means now. I knew what he meant the first time I heard that, but now I understand it because I actually feel the same way. Some of the stuff that Ive made, usually the stuff I really like, I dont actually assosiate with being my work. It just seems so detatched from me because its, I dont know, maybe it doesnt look like it needs that much work to it. It looks somewhat complete and also accurate and I dont know. It just happens. Maybe its like driving back from work. Something you do everyday. After awhile of going to the same job, youre bound to drive home and get out of the car just to realize that you dont actually remember the ride home because it was such a natural and habitual act, and quite possibly there was nothing but thought going on the ride home. The ride home seems detached from you cause you just sort of did it, you made all the right moves and took all the right turns without knowing you were and got home. That is what its like when I make something that I like. I think I realized that it doesnt quite come from me telling myself that I need to create something, it just happens without me knowing. For example, I went and got the drawing table today and set it up and rearranged my room so that I could do work in here, but that was all done just like the ride home from work. I didnt have any feelings of "darnit this is a hassel" or " I wish this would all just come together a lot easier" or " this is going to be great, I can do work in here now". I wasnt thinking about it at all. And then for some reason I started sculpting and I dont really know where it came from. It just happened. It seems like the entire act of arranging my room and sculpting was a ride home that you dont remember.

Anyway I guess the whole reason Im saying this is cause I like the thing that I sculpted. Of course its based on Rodin's sculpture. While I was sculpting I thought that it would be neat to have a portfolio of these little sketch sculptures, cause thats sorta what I think of this as. The only downfall (maybe a downfall? I dont really mind) is that I dont have that much clay, so I have to destroy the sculpture after I make it, so that I can make more. So I took a bunch of pictures, over 100, of this one, and proceeded to smash the sculpture. Now it no longer exists the way you see it in the photos.




While I was sculpting I realized that I needed some support for the figure, so I went to my tool box and grabbed a spoon and a fork that I bent, both of which from freshman year college. I used the spoon for his head and jabbed the handle down his neck into his torso. When I started to make his arm I needed more support, so I grabbed the large nail clippers and opened them, with the thicker part of the clippers in his bicep and the thinner part of the clippers in his forarm. Then I propped him up against another hunk of clay and used the fork to support his arm so that it wouldnt flop back. You can see the nail clippers in this one.



I decided to put a bunch of pictures of cause I got a different look from the flash settings. Sometimes it looked metalic, like the one above and below. But then other time it wasnt as monochromatic.

MESSAGE to a friend

Hey, howsa going?

So we havent really been keeping in touch it seems. Come to think of it, its kinda weird that we do keep in touch at all, but its neat! Hows summer going? its almost over by now! Kinda. If I were going back to school Id only have a couple of weeks till I went back for cross country. Jeez come to think of it I better get in better shape and quick! I planned on racing my friend Chris when he returned for cross country, and I planned on beating him too, so I better get to it. I havent been running in the past month or so, but last night, my friend from high school ran to our house and I got ready and went running just under 5 miles with him at 11 at night. It was great, he's always been much faster than me but somehow I was able to run with him and it wasnt that bad, until I had to poop. MAN that sucks, having to poop when youre running is the worst.

But yeah, so Im in Ithaca now and its nice here. For the first couple weeks it was really neat cause my friend Mike and Jake live here, my friend Curt was living here, and I live with my friend Keith and his twin brother Zach. All of us were on the cross country team in high school except for Zach, and we went swimming one day, and it was awesome. I didnt think about it till we were walking back to the car, but it was kind of unreal to see all these guys I was hanging out with, cause Ive never really been to Ithaca before, and I was hanging out with a group of friends already, and they were guys I used to hang out with all the time. It was so great. Since then however, Curts moved away. He went to school at Ithaca College but he graduated. Mike and Jake both go to Cornell and have a few more years here. And since then Ive been feeling kinda crummy.

It took me a couple weeks till I got a job here. But they were pretty nice weeks. I was running and biking all over the place, going swimming and cliff diving in the gorges every other day, hanging out with my friends, playing guitar and working on some art stuff. It was neato. O man, and the deer, theres deer every where in my neighborhood. I thought that was cool too. But now I got a job cleaning a Target, and I hate it. Not only does working there give me a bad feeling, its actually making me feel bad. I think Im getting sick from the chemicals and cleaning stuff. I also watched this movie called No Impact Man, maybe youve heard of it. If not, its a documentary about a guy, his wife and his daughter who try to not have any sort of negative impact on the environment for a year. So they dont drive or use electricity, they get all their food locally, its neato. I liked it. But it was also kind of in line with some stuff I have been writing about, about finding ways to make more cost effective materials, and not waste materials with the idea of making money, when it cost more than you gain. Its sort of like the way we drill for oil now. Companies spend a certain amount of money and oil in order to drill and refine oil, thats sort of necessary in order to get it. But now, they are using up more than they are getting, and it just doesnt make any sense. Its kind of like saying, "well I need a car to get to my job, so Im going to get a job to save to get a car" Silly things like that, where people dont realize that they are being absolutely ridiculous. And the fact that people are doing silly thigns like this isnt really what everyone misses. I mean it kind of is, but thats not whats so important. Whats ridiculous is that these actions of every day safe and healthy routine are considered a safe and healthy routine. It might be sad that it seems in this cycle of getting a car to get to your job so you can get a car is what runs peoples lives today, but its even more sad that people dont realize that this routine isnt healthy, and not just because it turns you into this being that is striving to get something that isnt whats really important to it. The sad part is that this stuff is just really bad for the environment and for your health, and people dont see that there every day actions are so out of whack now. Just because we do it every day and because this is the way the world works now, doesnt mean its a good thing. It would be like a kid who is born into a racist nazi house hold. The only thing he's ever known is what his parents tell him, so he goes through life thinking that this is the way things are and these are the truths that he knows. Some one might say something to him like" youre ridiculous, how can you think like that? Dont you know that what youre doing is wrong and destructive?" But he wouldnt know that, because he doesnt understand how the way he's lived his whole life could be wrong. Its worked for him and he's still alive, so it must be fine. But I could say that same line to just about anyone and it would be the same thing. "youre ridiculous, how can you think like that? Dont you know that what youre doing is wrong and destructive?" The only thing is, I wouldnt be talking about racism. Id be talking about the routines of people lives which they dont see are harmful. Like buying things every day, and then throwing it out, as if once a piece of waste goes in the garbage it disappears. And my job has really helped me to see that a little more, and also gotten me kind of angry about it. What my employers want to see from me is a "clean store" Now, we all know what clean means, but that doesnt mean that its actually clean. What they want to see are shiny tile floors and carpets with no stains and no garbage on the ground. They wanna see bathrooms that are spotless and windows with no streaks, they want to see organized products on the shelves and garbage cans with little to no garbage in them. But what I do isnt clean the store, I just rub chemicals on the ground that make it shiny, I rub chemicals on the toilet and in the sinks, spray the windows with some toxic spray and buff the floors with tanks of fuel. Then, I wipe it all up with paper towels, tons of paper towels and throw them in the garbage and wash the chemicals down the drain, where it goes back into our water system. Then, I collect all of the garbage and compile it into one spot. The funny thing is, probably about a third of the garbage is from me, using stuff to clean up the garbage. And most of the stuff that is already in the garbage is stuff that was already in the store, cases and containers for batteries and video games, tags to clothes, tampons, diapers, food wrappers and soda cans, a lot of stuff that doesnt even leave the store, and now its garbage. If you look at it my way, the next time you walk into a clean Target, youre going to see a lot of garbage. They stock the shelves with it, its in the packaging and the labeling of everything, every useless advertisement and attention grabber, just so that the companies can try their best to ensure that it will catch the eye of a potential buyer, ensuring a sell so that they can make more money. But all the money that is wasted in trying to ensure these sales, is like drilling with oil to get oil. And Im good at my job too, and they tell me that I dun good and they appreciate having me there. I leave the store every morning leaving the place looking spotless, but its one of the dirtiest things Ive seen.

I work 4 am to 10 am and I dont mind the ride to work, I ride my bike. I see deer just about every morning and its great cause sometimes they get a little spooked, this morning one ran along side me for 10 meters or so, but usually they just look up from the grass, see its me, and go right back to chewing on their greens. They are usually right by the road too. I dont know, that was probably a lot for one note. haha. Its weird, but I feel like this feeling is sort of coming out of nowhere, but then I think that its actually in line with everything Ive always thought to be right and true. Like why I dont have a car and why Ive wanted to go live in the woods and off the land ever since I can remember. Its only now that Im actually getting a basis for the things that Ive thought. Before, most of my morals were a little more philosophical, but now its straight from examples of stuff I see and live every day. I dont know, I need to think of something. Im not going to work here much longer. I also got a side job doing catering with Keith, he works at a bakery. Its fun, but theres just as much waste. Once you know the way things are, you cant really unsee it. Its kinda like if youre friend said something really awful about you behind your back and you found out about it. Every time you say them, youd know what was really going on. And it would suck, cause it would make you angry, this person who was supposed to be loyal and someone who youve depended on for years isnt quite what you thought. Well its kinda like that. Theres this store down the road that sells a lot of local foods I think, and I got an application. I gotta figure something out.

Anyway, this is probably a lot heavier than any thing else Ive sent you, haha, but its sort of whats going on, and I guess its actually really getting to me. I hope youre having fun this summer and it would be so awesome if you could have come up here. It so nice here! there are so many gorges and places to swim and lots of green open areas with great views. Its beautiful here. Too bad you couldnt come.
Miss you, Hank

organized garbage

idea for an installation...kinda. just a reminder for myself.

I had a long day at work that extended 2 days. First I worked at Target, cleaning all the bathrooms and vacuuming and all that stuff. 6 hours and no break with no time to even sit down. Its not all that bad, but I do have to kind of hustle to get everything done. So thats 4 am to 10 am. Then I had a break in the day before a new catering job at 3 oclock. I used my break to go to salvation army to get clothes for the catering thing. Then I went to the catering thing, a wedding. It was my first day and it ended up being an 11 hour day, I didnt get out till 2 in the morning. I think I was sweating the entire 11 hours, Im pretty sure I was. Thats not an exageration. Well then I had work again at 4 in the morning and I wasnt feeling up to it really. So I stayed there just to get the bathrooms done and left at 6.

Anyway, I was kinda tired and slept most of the day. When I woke up I watched this documentary called No Impact Man. I had heard about it maybe a year ago and wanted to see it. Well I did and liked it. Also got some ideas from it. And of course they relate to sci-fi...of course.

The movie is about a man who decides that he wants to live a year in his apartment with his wife and child, making no negative impact on the environment. So he doesnt drive or buy new things and doesnt produce any garbage, gets all of his food locally and all that stuff. It was great. In the movie there were shots of him being on tv and talk shows and good morning america and being in newspapers and all that stuff. It was a big deal, I mean I even watched the movie. He also had a blog and there were tons of comments and things written about him all over the place saying how he was stupid and dirty and that they didnt like what he was doing and hated it and thought he was rediculous or something. This all made me think of sci-fi.

Watching the movie, especially the parts where he was in the news, made me think of how this is such a sci-fi thing. A sci-fi thing is something that I often find myself thinking about. To me, finding a sci-fi thing, is something that is now common but once wasnt. It can also be the exact opposite however, for example in this case, something that once was common, but no longer is. I call this sci-fi and point it out cause it really stands out to me as a reflection of ourselves today and the way people have lived and the general outlook of our own lives and society and individuals throughout history. I call this sci-fi because I believe that the purpose of good science fiction is to broaden the spectrum of possibility and observation of ones self and ones society. This along with scientific evidence help to bring about the idea that perhaps there could be some merit to these ideas that seem so radical and unrealistic. Its sort of like this term used in acting and science fiction, its whats called the willing suspension of disbelief. It is clear when watching a play, that the people you are watching arent actually kings and queens, or street rats or actual cats. You have to willingly allow yourself to fall into this world in order to understand the story. Its the same with science fiction, clearly the idea of itnerstellar space travel isnt something that is possible for people the way we read it in books. But we have to willingly allow ourselves to believe the things we read in order to understand the story and the point or moral of the story.

So watching this made me think of sci-fi because I have this thing in my head that pops up when Im reading or watching or thinking about sci-fi...stuff. And that thing is the people who sort of dont allow themselves to become interested, or the people who see science fiction and fantasy as childish things that are a waste of time. It seems to me like the mindset of this person is one who might watch a space movie or some futuristic city film and just laugh at the flying cars and interstellar travel, thinking that its a stupid movie just because of the setting. Now I definetely find humor in most movies, based on a lot of things such as the setting and the dialouge and props and acting, basically the stuff that youre not really supposed to notice, but I point it out and laugh at it. However, this doesnt mean that the point of the story isnt relavent or important. Just because the effects of a film arent on par with spielberg, doesnt mean that what the film has to say isnt as good as something much better than spielberg. Most of his movies have a basic cookie cutter plot anyway, its just the effects that make a movie "good" today.

This movie, No Impact Man, and its tv and radio spots, made me think of the people who dont like sci-fi. In this case, Ill call them the insiders, and theres a reasom for that name. I call them that because they are the kind of person who cant seem to understand concepts outside of their realm of imediate impact on their life...in a way. Thats kind of saying a lot but it works in relation to this post and to the No Impact Man. All of the people who were disregarding this man and saying how much they hated what he was doing, they were the insiders. They are the same people as the ones who disregard science fiction as good works of literature.

What was so funny about this movie were those parts where he was on tv and in the news, because that was the total sci-fi part. People were baffled by what he was doing, and it kept coming up in the movie, the question of is it possible to lead a healthy happy life, while producing no garbage. What a silly thing. Its as if he were an alien and people had no idea what to do, they didnt understand it and werent used to it, so they basically came up with reasons to not like it, because it wasnt what they were doing. People seem to just be too involved with the way they have always lived. Something that is new might actually be a better choice than the way things are typically done today. After watching the movie I talked to Kristine on the phone who liked what I had to say about the movie. She is very picky about her food, and I think my talk about people disliking this man and his way, made her think about herself and her food habits. She told me about how her mom put frozen food in a microwave for a few seconds and that she got grossed out by it, because she didnt put it on a plate. She also told me about how her mom dropped some meat on the garage floor and came back in to wash it off to prepare it, but Kristine said that she wasnt going to eat it because it fell on the floor where theres dirt and probably gasoline.

In this situation, I thought of the things that people have been lead to believe are acceptable and healthy and safe. So in this case, microwaving food is safe, but without a plate its not. Having this device in our house which sends microwaves back and forth in order to produce heat which, after long term exposure is proven to have carcinigenic effects is safe. But frozen food with no plate? And the same with dropping the food on the ground. Its perfectly safe and smart to drive a car to work everyday which releases carbon emmisions and to then yourself walk around these vehicles that produce the material which then goes into your lungs, but washing off the food that fell on the garage floor isnt good enough to go into our bodies. The same hipocritical sort of logic goes into my job, of cleaning Target. What my employers and costumers are looking for is a clean Target, and by that I mean a store that doesnt have any pieces of garbage on the ground and one that has little garbage in the garbage cans and a shiny floor. This doesnt mean that its clean or that Im making anything clean. It just means that Im spreading chemicals all over the store and then flushing these toxic chemicals down the drain to go back into the water system. This means that Im just collecting all of the garbage produced in one day, garbage that probably adds up to 200 pounds, maybe more, I dont think I could lift all of it up if it were in one bin. Then Im throwing it in a bin to be sent to a place where there is nothing but mounds of garbage. And this is whats seen as safe and clean and heathly. But a man that tries to have no harmful effects on the environment is critisized?

Its hard to get all of my thoughts together when writing something like this because clearly there is a lot that goes into my thinking process, at least on this issue. Its also hard to write something that makes sense when Im somewhat angry at these people who I cant even really give a face to. Its the closed off mindset, the outlook which doesnt allow for progression as a more healthy functioning society. Its the in it for yourself mentality which breeds stagnation and closed off ignorance when anything new arrives. Im sure there are more things I want to say about this, and I know that it would just branch out to more and more things, but I think I should leave it at this right now, because ultimately I want to have a positive atitude when it comes to everything. Its hard to see a chance of a successful society of intelligent people living for eachother when I live and work on this planet. But I always want to have a positive outlook on everything I do, and I know that there is always something useful out of every experience. So that is the sort of mindset that I eventually want to go with in terms of this post. However Im a little torn right now with my feelings of agression to the bulk of people who are still insiders. So Im just going to leave this post as concluded.

this just in

just had an idea for a new way to travel. ok so im just going to let loose and sound as much like a nerd as is possible in order to make my idea understandable. its for long distance travel, maybe even space travel. its for magnetic attraction to actually pull a ship or vehicle. it would be sent through radio waves in a way, so that it is sort of on one signal. and then received by the vehicle and then it would pull in the ship or whatever. i dont think this is possible, but im sort of trying this thing out. here goes.

So I started to get interested in where all my interests and artistic ideas come from, and it brought me to being a kid and collecting stuff and yeah, basically just analyzing myself. Well I remember thinking about a lot of really radical stuff, and I started to run into these ideas again my senior year of college. It was funny, but a lot of the stuff I was learning about my senior year was stuff I had once played around with, like in acting class and my sci-fi class and just a lot of stuff. So NNNOOOOWWWWW... I decided to try and let loose with my goofy childish ideas and just let my thoughts come out. I dont even really care if its not possible. Cause the stuff might not be possible now, but maybe some day it is. Back in the 1700's it was impossible to reach people at a moments notice. Battles were even fought after wars had been declared over. But now, I can get information from around the world so quickly. It would have seemed like a rediculous idea if someone had said " if only we could have known instantly that the war was over, then these people woudlnt have died." of course back then people would have said"well thats just not possible to know that sort of thing." and it was true. it wasnt possible then. But there are so many things that have actually sort of started out in sci-fi books that end up coming true in a way. Im thinking of the hitch hikers guid to the galaxy. The actual guide is a book filled with virtually limitless information based on peoples accounts of traveling around the galaxy. This was a super rediculous futuristic idea. The book was written by a comic and it was in a setting where space travel, in the form of traversing incredible unthinkable distances is possible. Along with this, the idea of a book composed of information from numerous authors about traveling the galaxy is sort of a way of saying that he was making this incredible thing that was just not actually possible. But now we have the internet. Its not about traveling the galaxy, but im sure that its in there somewhere. Whats even more incredible, is that reading this book at the time it was written, 70's I think, Im sure someone must have said"wouldnt it be so neat if there was something like this? a place we can get all this info from different accounts? just look it up and you can get different oppinions on travel." and just like in the 1700's with that soldier wishing for a magic to be able to know things the instant they happen, this person probably got a response something like" yeah but theres no way that could ever work." And just like the change from the 1700's, now this is possible. The only difference is that was only about 30 years ago, where it seemed impossible to achieve a science fiction invention. Imagine what could be possible in the next 5 years.

I guess all im saying is that Im letting my ideas run wild cause I used to have loads of ideas that people thought were really great, and I kinda let them fade away cause I was trying to be realistic. The reality of the matter is, nothing can ever come to be until it is first thought up or tested. So what the heck, Im just going to go crazy with my ideas I guess. Besides, it gives me more stuff to write about on here.

Ralph McQuarrie

I dont like to have too much of just writing on here, so I figured Id put some of these up. Some of my favorite sci-fi art.

Nerd

So I think Im pretty much a nerd now, or a geek or something like that. Some word that is associated with not necessarily being intelligent but having an interest in sci-fi and whatnot. Keith and I were looking up movies and shows to get on the netflix and just about my only interest was in sci-fi. And I remembered, looking through, that I used to watch Quantum Leap as a kid. HA! What a rediculous show. Anywho we watched Blade Runner and Ive only seen that movie once before, so I was pointing out most of the things that I noticed which are also in Shadowrun, a super nintendo game I had when I was a kid. It was really funny watching this movie cause the games setting was pretty much the same as the movie, at least the best that the creaters could do at the time. The intro is the same for both, the main charaters look almost exactly the same and they even have the same name.

Anyway, I was talking to keith about some more of my ideas on transportation ideas, as sort of a futuristic setting maybe.
I started getting this idea awhile back that roads would soon be built with sensors at the speed limit signs, that read the speed of the vehicles passing. And that police would be able to tell where most of the fast and reckless driving was happening by looking through files or something. Then I started to develope this idea more. The further development came from some of my designs for cars and bikes. I had this idea for cars that would eventually be linked into the sensor system of the roads, and that if a car did go over the speed limit, the license plate would be marked and documented as having a traffic violation, eliminating some of the time police use trafficing the roads. There would be effects on this though, maybe drivers would not feel so inclined to follow the rules knowing that police wouldnt be likely to pull them over, and that maybe they could just write a letter so they wouldnt have to go to court and pay the whole fine. This would still bring in way more money than the system now, because it would document every traffic violation, at least as far as speeding is concerned. But maybe the gain in money wouldnt be enough, cause people would start to drive more wreckless and there might be more accidents. So this got me thinking that maybe the cars would be allowed to drive their vehicle, but only up until the speed limit, so that they would actually not be allowed to drive over the speed limit. They driver could have control of the speed of the vehicle, but only up until the speed limit. This is more in link with my ideas that I was coming up with for my bike design, with wheels that are essentially the motor for the vehicle. It also corrolates with another idea that ive had before, about a powering system.

Ive had an idea for this universal portable powering energy...thing. Like a spark plug sorta, but more like portable electricity, BUT, it is made to power more than things that run off more than just electricity. So for example, lets just say that there was a small device, about the size of a spark plug, that held some sort of charge. You could use this charge by plugging it into your computer, your car, the tv, the refrigerator, a toaster, the lawn mower, anything. Its sort of like how now on computers, the flash drive port is kind of an essential thing for getting pictures and documents on it, and it can also be used as a port for a mouse or a keyboard, so that older computers dont have these, but newer computers do. Well its kinda like that, we'll say that the new spark plug device is kinda like a flash drive, and that it plugs into a port on any device. This would call for just about every device to be built with these receiving ports, so that you can run them. This is also where my bike design comes into play.

For now, this idea is only meant for a city, where the road sensors are built and whatnot. The city itself would have many stations around and under the city, where it would generate and distribute electricity and power to the city. This is what the spark plugs would be basically linked up to. The spark plug is more or less a wireless connection telling the city power station "hey I have one of these things so let me use your energy now." So in reality, the sparck plug isnt really what actually powers your stuff cause it doesnt really hold a charge. It just sends the signal asking for it. Houses would be built with reactive floors and countertops, that are actually able to distribute power to the refrigerator or the stove, just be contact. By plugging in the spark plug, it would allow for the energy trasnfer. The same would be for the road. Gas stations wouldnt be used like they are now, because cars that are on the system would be powered by the magnetic tracks under the roads. This is where the road system comes into play. The cars wouldnt be able to go over the speed limit, because there would be a limit to how much energy is allowed to one unit on the roads.

This is all probably really goofy and just science fictiony. Its kind of in my head now as a really far off fifth element looking future. It didint start out like that though. I was initially kind of imagining ideas for traffic safety, and I dont really know why I was sorta sitting in the car thinking "hmm maybe i need to think up ways to improve the conditions on the road." I dont know. I think theres more to go with this, but I cant think of anything right now. I should get to bed anyway.